Christmas Is Over, On To The New Year

Is there anything as depressing as driving home after the holidays? The scenery is dreary. The weather is generally gloomy. There is not much coming up to look forward to, except maybe watching the Huskers lose a bowl game. (Aren’t I optimistic?)

The only thing I remember being more depressing is going back to school after holiday vacation. Going back to school after summer vacation was a little sad, but it also was exciting. You could always look forward to seeing your friends again and anticipate what the new school year would be like. But after Christmas vacation, you knew what the school year was going to be like and it was going to be a long stretch until the next vacation.

So what are we going to look forward to now? Valentine’s Day? Don’t make me laugh. I’ve had two kids. I might pee myself a little.

I am enjoying the clothes and movies and music and books I got for Christmas. That is fun.

Fortunately, vacation isn’t entirely done yet. We are using the rest of the days off to go to a few movies, spend a little Christmas money, and eat foods that would totally be off the diet list. But if you can’t eat good around the holidays, are they really holidays?

That’s what January and New Year’s resolutions are all about. Starting a new diet and eating stuff that’s good for you. You know, all that stuff that makes you miss the holidays. All that stuff that makes you sad when you are driving home after the holidays.

I was changing over the calendar to a new 2012 calendar yesterday, putting in all the birthdays and things I need to remember next year. Every December I look over the past year, month by month, to make sure I don’t miss anything. It’s kind of a tradition for me; it is kind of a review of the past year as I get ready for the new one.

There were some really fun times I remember writing down. There were the volleyball, soccer, basketball, and football games. We had so many wonderful times and saw our wonderful friends at these events. There was the 7^th and 8^th grade school trip I helped chaperone to Martin Luther College. That was fun and Mandy and I got to see a side of our Lutheran synod that we just don’t get to see in Nebraska. There was the NELHS volleyball tournament. The kids’ school team won their division, and both kids were able to work hard on the court and be proud of their performance. I will never forget watching my kids work together and finally win a trophy. There was the Mobridge/Rushmore vacation this summer and the trip to Hawaii this December. Those were incredible. It made me want to go on Expedia and make plans for 2012.

But there were things I saw that gave me a low, sinking feeling. There were the doctor’s appointments for my skin issues and surgeries. It also made me remember my dad’s surgeries and hospital visits in 2011. How much better he looks today. He’s not quite completely his old self, but he is so much healthier. The first day of school for the kids was no picnic, either. It was so hard for Mandy to go back when most of her friends moved on to high school. The first couple of weeks were so difficult and filled with sadness. But it is such a blessing that she is so happy and confident today. Instead of sitting around, she rushes out to do new things, meet new people, write new stories. She works her butt off, literally, to be one of the stronger players on her volleyball gold team. She is actually a lot stronger person—inside and out—then I ever was in high school.

So what are we going to look forward to in 2012?

Fun stuff. Mandy has her volleyball practices and games to keep us running. She has four practices a week, plus tournaments every other weekend. Both kids also have basketball, through YMCA and through school. We can’t wait to see them play in the school tournament. They won’t win the tournament, like they did in volleyball. But it will be the last year they will play on a team together, and that is just wonderful to me. I hope they each make a few baskets and rebounds and maybe even run a screen for the other one or help each other out on the court.

It was exciting to write down the date for the kids’ school play. They both have major parts in the play. I’m not sure if either one is the villain. Last year they were the villains, and were unfortunately very good at playing villains. I’m not sure what that means psychologically, but it probably isn’t fantastic. Joe surprised us all with his acting skills. I can’t count how many people came up to tell me how impressed they were with Joe and his evil businessman moves.

Both kids will be taking the hunter safety class this year. I should have had Joe in this class before he turned 12, but I thought he had to be 12 first. My bad. Anyway, now Mandy is also interested in shooting and wants to take the class with her brother. Joe actually hit several blue rock when he was shooting over the break in Cozad. He is anxious to keep practicing. And Mandy? She likes being tough, like the boys. However, I hate to tell her that she just can not look like a bad ass with pigtails. It just isn’t working.

This year will also mark our 20 year anniversary. Maybe Rick and I will do something fun to celebrate. Or maybe we will just run our kids around to sporting events. Most likely the latter.

If we do take a trip this year, I am hoping we will finally make it to Yellowstone. I’ve wanted to take the kids there for years. But Rick’s coaching baseball and midget football has always gotten in the way. It is sacrilege, evidently, for a coach to miss a practice or a game. Buttermaker can’t let anybody else yell at his boys for him. But nobody is getting any younger here.

When I came to writing in the rest of the kids’ school dates, I got a major sucker punch in the gut. This year Mandy will get confirmed. And she will graduate from the Lutheran grade school. She will no longer be my baby. She will be all grown up, taking communion, getting a picture slide show of her during her school years at graduation. In fact, I had to write down the dates for high school signup deadlines in January. In the next few weeks she has to make a final decision about what high school she wants to go to and we have to send in her intent letter.

This year will be a major change in our household. Mandy will go to high school. No longer will I drop both kids off at the same school. No longer will they have recess together. Talk about a stomach ache. Mandy will be walking down the halls of some Class A high school. She will have to run from classroom to classroom at the bell. She will have to try out for volleyball. She will have to take finals. She will have to deal with mean girls and gigolo teenage boys.

I don’t think I’m ready for 2012.

But one thing I’ve learned this last year is that no matter what the challenge, it is all part of God’s plan. I’ve always been a fixer and a worrier. I try to fix everyone’s problems. And the ones I can’t fix, I sit around and worry about.

Truth be told, I am not in control of anything. That is a huge challenge for someone who is a total control freak. It’s all part of God’s plan. He is the one calling all the shots. What I can control, however, is how I deal with it. I can worry or I can pray. And even though I don’t understand why God has put certain events in my life, they are there for a reason. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

So it’s onwards and upwards for 2012.

I’m looking forward to big basketball games and a new niece or nephew in the next month or two. I’m also anticipating the big changes for the coming year. I’ve always feared change. And big changes mean big fear. Maybe my strong daughter can teach me courage this fall. I’m going to need some of her strength.

But I’ve got a few months before things start to get hectic. Where are those truffles Joe gave me for Christmas? It ain’t January yet.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will direct your paths.

Proverbs 3, 5-6

It's Christmas Eve, Step Away from the Microwave

It's Christmas Eve. Well I suppose this would be the right time to write a Christmas blog if I was gonna write a Christmas blog. So here it goes.

I don’t know about your family, but by the time Christmas Eve rolls around, we are all about Christmased out. There have been Christmas decorations in the stores, Christmas lights on the houses, and Christmas songs on the radio for about the last two months. Most people went straight from Halloween to Christmas. I saw that some stores had a combination of the two in October. These are strange, strange days.

But I suppose I can’t completely blame the retailers. What percent of the entire year’s sales are made at a retail store in the last month of the year? Shirley? A little help here? I would venture to guess it could be around 50% or more. Or maybe a lot more. And so if the stores want to extend that season to make more sales, I’m sure they will do about anything -- if money is involved.

Anyways, the holidays are here. Last night we had our annual Everts’ family pitch tournament/Christmas party. Kudos to Aunt Kathy for putting it all together, reserving the site, and ordering the pizza. Somehow we always, always have way too much food. Lots of desserts and goodies and party beverages. The cranberry margaritas were a new twist. Thank you Sarah for the peanut butter balls. I see pregnancy hasn’t slowed you down too much. Or else you just really had a craving.

Mandy and I were on a pitch team together. Rick teamed with my dad and Joe was with my brother Mark -- talk about high bidding, obnoxious gloaters. I’m not sure which of those two teams could be worse. It was a loud and raucous tournament. Cousins Jake and Kyle won – the brothers Danielson. Mandy was so proud that they are now both taller than she is.

Mandy and I ended up at the losers table. However, I must say that we just came down from the winners table and ended there. It was kind of a “luck of the draw/musical chairs” thing. Time ran out and we ended at the bottom. (My sister Carrie, I’m sure, would have some snarky remark to insert here.) I will say that the walk of shame from the winners table to the bottom at the losers table is oh so painful. I think we could have taken Jake and Kyle had we still been at the winners table. We stomped them earlier. But Mandy and I will try to lose with grace and panache – if that is even possible in our family. Probably not.

 We will be ready for next year, however. We definitely have our victory dance down. It involves a little cabbage patch and a little shoulder brushing. Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Yesterday was also the observance of Festivus at Rick’s office. It is an annual holiday revered by old Seinfeld fans. If you are not familiar with the Festivus practices, check it out on YouTube. They searched for an aluminum pole, but only had one of PVC. The feats of strength began with the crushing of cans and ended by lifting the back end of Gordon’s new Honda. There was time for the airing of grievances. Riley started it off. However, as far as the grievance thing goes, I’m highly doubtful that these guys have any problems airing their grievances any given day. There are no big secrets at the Flatwater Group. Fortunately the holiday observance ended without any wrestling and no one had to cry. Had to, I said.

I got my Christmas photo cards out yesterday. Thursday I placed my order and picked them up that evening. At 7:45pm I was about the only person in Walgreens, along with the checkers. It was deathly quiet. It was about the only place in Lincoln that was that quiet.

I got the letters in the mail yesterday. I was not the only one there. Another last-minute mailer was at the post office with me, sorting our mail in piles so they could go in the local Lincoln mail slot and the out-of-town slot. We had our stuff scattered all over the entry way; people had to step around us to mail their last-minute bills. Oh well. It’s done.

I know I will get into all kinds of trouble because there was no Christmas letter in the cards this year. My Aunt Elaine loves Rick’s Christmas cat letter. He always writes the letter as Maggie the cat and she says her Christmas isn’t complete without it. But if I waited for a letter from Maggie this year, there would be no cards whatsoever. Oh snap. My bad. I’ll worry about that later.

Before I went to the post office, I wrangled with the traffic at the SouthPointe mall. That place was a zoo. People may have been happy in the stores, but they turned into lunatic harpies once they got into their cars. I didn’t have any shopping left to do. Mandy went to the Sherlock Holmes movie there with her friend Isaac. (I know. But she is 14, and I did drop her off and pick her up, as per the rules of the 14-year-old date. There was the painful, one-arm reciprocating hug from Isaac at the end. They gave each other huge candy bars for Christmas. I think I have until October until he turns 16 and I have to worry about bring-homes. But then I may have a whole new world of worries by that time. Just blink and the picture completely changes. Lov’n this whole teenage girl thing. “But it wasn’t a date, mom.” Clearly I still have “Stupid” tattooed on my forehead.)

Currently I am baking homemade cinnamon rolls, as per my Grandma Everts’ recipe. I add the goo to the top, however. Her cinnamon rolls were perfect plain. But Joe likes his rolls gooey with the sticky stuff on top. You evolve for your audience. Plus, I like to lick the bowl after I make the caramel goo. There’s got to be some benefit of being the little red hen.

I am breaking for tradition for tonight’s supper, however. We generally have chili and oyster stew for supper on Christmas Eve. But tonight I am making prime rib. I’ve calculated my roast pounds time 5 minutes and I think it will be fantastic. We’ve got a good rub for the outside and I am going to put a big sign on the stove so no one opens it for the allotted two hours. Rick is pretty excited about the whole deal. He is sitting downstairs watching the NFL football games, foaming at the mouth. Better make my sign a little bigger.

(Adding an aside here. During my critical 26 minutes of cook time at 500 degrees, Rick turned off my timer to warm up something in the microwave. Men. I think I have scrambled enough to salvage the whole affair. I now have Joe positioned on his computer, close to the oven. If Rick enters the kitchen, Joe has been instructed to announce: “Step away from the microwave.” No one messes with Joe’s roast. He will see it through.)

Tonight I play organ for Christmas Eve. It is a song service with about a dozen hymns. It is going to be by candlelight, as well. So that will be cool. Usually I wear out my fingers at these services, but tonight Marcus volunteered to play the preservice, offertory, and postlude for me. He has been taking organ lessons at MLC and is going to show off his mad skills. He sounds fantastic.

The bad part of the whole deal is that the church ordered a brand new organ from Ahlborn Galanti that was supposed to be delivered in time for Christmas from Italy. After much to do, the thing got held up at customs this week and won’t be here for the holidays. Bummer, bummer, bummer. Marcus and I were really looking forward to the Zimbelstern for our Silent Night and angel pieces. Oh well, you can’t miss something you haven’t had. But I’m still a little sad. L

After church we will take a ride around Lincoln and look at the Christmas lights. If anyplace is open, we will stop for hot chocolate. Then we will come home and watch “A Christmas Story.” Maybe I should have made a Christmas duck tonight. No. I don’t think I could have found one with the head attached.

Tomorrow will be another round at the organ for the Christmas morning service. Then we will open presents and lay around the rest of the day watching random movies and feasting on ham. I haven’t thawed the turkey yet – so it’s turkey for New Year’s Eve. Oh snap.

There will be lots of presents and paper. I won’t mention what anyone is getting for Christmas, just in case. I will say I made a lot of trips to Best Buy. But you never know, someone might take a huge dive off the nice list. You’ve got to behave in the clutch. The walk of shame to the naughty list is oh so painful.

Merry Christmas to all our family and friends. Remember that Jesus is the reason for the season and that wise men seek him still.

                                                              White Christmas

                                                                   Festivus

                                                                        Scott Fargus

                                                                         Fa Ra Ra

Sea Turtles, Beach Drinks, Hawaiian Shirts, and Bikinis

Maui and Lincoln, Nebraska have very little in common. I will admit they both are easy to find your way around, they both have small airports, and you don’t have to drive far to see a cow. Really.

Maui seems like a world away from Lincoln. In mid-December the temperatures are in the 80s, the water is warm, and the breeze smells like flowers and pineapple. 

It was on a whim that we hit the Purchase button and decided to join our friends the Blomes on a trip to Maui. We went through Expedia and the package deal was just too good to pass up. We would have been fools to turn it down. Really.

But Rick and I never travel. If we do, we only drive about one state away. So it was pretty exciting to think that we would travel across an ocean to visit somewhere we had never dreamed of going before.

We managed to pack all the necessities, including two bottles of Dramamine, and didn’t get kicked off the plane for packing anything that violated airline regulations. There’s always that last minute panic if your little bottle of hand sanitizer is going to get you stuck in the body search line. Todd drove like a bat out of hell to make it to the airport before we left, and we were cutting it pretty close to the check in time. But neither of the guys was worried about the time. Typical men.

I was a little worried about the flight from Dallas to Maui. They delayed the plane about 30 to 45 minutes at the loading dock while a mechanic fixed a faulty switch that was causing the left engine not to switch on. I said a couple of quick prayers that the switch was working, because I was pretty sure we were going to need the left engine the next eight and a half hours.

But once we got off the plane, we could tell we had left winter behind us. The wind was heavy, but it was warm. We kept asking ourselves, “Can you believe we are really doing this?”

We stayed at a really nice hotel, the Fairmont Kea Lana, which was completely open air and had its own beach area. Not only was the air warm, so were the people. The staff says “aloha” every time they see guests. Even up until the last day of our vacation I kept forgetting to say aloha whenever one of the hotel staff greeted me. Like a dork, I would say hello, and then aloha. Clearly I am not meant for international relations. (Yes, I know, Maui is not international. It is part of the 50 states. I get that.)

Some of the major highlights of our trip included a whale watching boat ride out on the ocean. We saw a mother whale and her baby. The whales come to the islands to have their babies at this time of year, but December is still pretty early in the season. They even put a microphone in the water so we could hear the whale calls under water. Pretty cool. We went to a Luau. The entertainment was great. The hula dancers (guys and girls) were spectacular, especially the fire dancer who only caught his costume on fire once. The dude actually laid the flaming baton on his upturned feet. Yikes. We stayed away from the Poi, but enjoyed the roast pig that they just dug up out of the fire pit. The luau was everything I expected, from the leis and grass skirts, to the pina coladas and men in, well, Hawaiian shirts.

Thanks to Melissa and Todd’s recommendations, we ate at some awesome restaurants while on the island. We went to Mama’s Fish House, which is visited by a number of celebrities, and is beautifully located right on the ocean. The fish is caught fresh every day and the fishermen just pull their boats right up to the restaurant’s dock. In fact, the name of the fishermen who catch the fish and the name of their boats are written on the menu each day. The fish was fantastic, but we wished that it hadn’t been raining so we could have gone out to the beach and enjoyed the view.

While Mama’s Fish House was impressive, it wasn’t as impressive as Nick’s Fish House. (Imagine that, another house of fish. Must be an island.) As soon as we went to our table, six staff descended upon our table, pulling out chairs and placing napkins on our laps. The minute we took a drink of water, someone refilled the glass. The boys really enjoyed messing with the wait staff, of course. The waiters artfully replaced our bread basket when it was empty without us even realizing it. They also straightened our silverware for us and swept the table with a little crumb catcher before dessert. Our waiter had an artful way of one-handedly tipping a beer glass with the bottle as he slowly filled the glass without foam. He did this artfully until Todd and Rick distracted him by asking him about his girlfriend there on the island. Of course, Rick’s reward was a glass full of foam, so he got what was coming to him.

And we ordered our fair share of drinks at the Fairmont. We ordered fancy drinks at the lounge overlooking the ocean. We ordered fancy drinks at the restaurants. We ordered fancy drinks at the pool. Almost all the drinks came with a big wedge of pineapple, an umbrella, and a flower floating on top. In Maui, it is OK for manly men to order girly drinks. They just have to remember to keep their pinkies down while drinking them.

Another highlight of the trip was the Road to Hana. It’s a treacherous 52 miles (most of which is one lane) with 617 curves (about half of which are blind curves), and 56 bridges (generally one lane). We traveled through a little town, which was obviously the marijuana capital of the Hawaiian Islands. There was no trouble telling which people there were the tourists and who were the residents. They dressed like surfers or like homeless people and looked as if they had something questionable they would be willing to sell you, if you had a few extra dollars to spare.

The drive was well worth the trip. It circled around the island and the views were spectacular. We stopped along the way to see the black sand beaches. That’s when, of course, Todd would stop. He has a tendency to slow down the car, and say, yep that’s nice. Then keep on driving. Unless, of course, there were cute, bikinied young tourists who needed help taking their pictures. Then he was able to slam on the brakes for the smallest of roadside waterfalls.

Of course the road beyond Hana quickly deteriorated to nothing more than a dirt cattle road with a little asphalt here and there. That’s what they don’t tell you. There were lots of straight drop-offs and blind curves. We met several “cowboys” out checking their cattle. It’s hard to call a guy with flip flops and Hawaiian shirt a cowboy. The road more or less went right around the mountain through their pasture. And of course we couldn’t go back the way we came. This was “shorter.” Really.

Memorable quotes from the Hana drive:

“There is no compass in a Jeep Compass.”

“After four or five beers I can just feel the road . . . just like speed racer.” (He actually didn’t have any beers. He was just trying to scare me.)

“There are seven sacred pools. That means virgins. We’re in.”

Favorite sign of the trip:

“Permits for medical marijuana and BBQ”

Todd really enjoyed driving this road, knowing full well that I am deathly afraid of heights. I don’t know how many times I heard, “Oh, Cindy, look at that view,” just to open my eyes to look over a straight drop off into the ocean. Todd is such a caring and conscientious guide. He made sure I didn’t miss any of the fantastic views. Really.

Speaking of heights, our helicopter tour of the island was canceled because of clouds and high winds. Evidently they’ve had some fatal crashes in the near past and don’t want to risk it. Oh shucks. When you put it that way… I’ve never been so relieved in my entire life.

The clouds and high winds were part of a front that went through when we were there, bringing a day or two of rain to the entire island. I guess that parts of the island hadn’t seen rain for months. Lucky us that we were able to bring it with us. But the rain really didn’t dampen our fun.

Another event we missed was a trip to the nude beach. Todd insisted we visit this beach. I, however, insisted that that is one sight a person cannot just unsee. It’s like seeing your dad in his underwear. It burns its image permanently on your brain. I do not need any images of 80-somethings completely commando. I saw enough 70- and 80-year-olds hanging out of their bikinis and speedos to last a lifetime.

The one thing I regret is that we didn’t spend more time just sitting by the ocean. The sand on the beach is so soft and fine. It is not course like the sand in Nebraska. It would be nice to spend more time in the ocean and the clear water.

Rick and Todd went kayaking on the ocean and Rick said they saw a group of sea turtles poking their heads out of the water. They were so close to the turtles he could have stuck out his hand and touched one. That was Rick’s highlight of the kayak excursion. Todd’s highlight was the bikini girl who gave them their lesson and sent them out on the trip. Todd, he can always appreciate a nice bikini.

Evidently he wasn’t the only one. Rick said there was an older couple sitting in chairs right next to the kayak path between the beach and the ocean. The woman had a huge stack of books she was earnestly reading. Rick said the man had nothing. He was just sitting there -- with a big smile on his face -- watching the bikini kayak instructor run back and forth across the beach sending the kayakers out on their way. This, I’m sure, is a future glimpse into Todd and Melissa’s vacation in 20 years.

The next time we go to Maui, we plan to take our kids. Everywhere we went, we caught ourselves saying “Mandy would love this.” Or, “Joe would be in heaven here.” Yes, Joe could spend an endless amount of time digging complex sand castles with irrigation cannels and roadway systems. He could also spend an endless amount of time just splashing in the waves or riding in the kayaks. Mandy, on the other hand, would prefer the pools. She would love how the waiters come running with fancy fruited drinks, and just charge it to her dad’s room.

She would, however, be very disappointed that there are very few teenage boys at the hotel. A few were setting up chairs on the beach. Unfortunately she would just be stuck hanging out with her family. It was just us, a few families with little kids, and the old people. Lots and lots of old people. Let’s face it, you have to be old to have enough money to afford Maui on a regular basis.

One thing that surprised me was how many non-natives lived and worked in Maui. One of the hotel drivers said that a lot of people move to Maui after they vacation there. They just love the island and don’t want to leave. However, most people who move to Maui don’t stay for even a year. He said that they come to Maui and expect it to be like it was when they were there on vacation – people waiting on them and bringing them beach drinks. When they realize that they still have to do their laundry and mow their yard in Maui, it loses its appeal. Especially when they discover how small the island can really be and how expensive it is.

Our vacation seemed to be over so quickly. We would love to go back and take the kids someday. We loved the scenery, as well as the people we met. There is something about being in such a warm, welcoming place that makes people friendly, as well.

Sure, there were some rich jerks. We saw a group of them on our plane, mouthing off to the shuttle driver when we landed. Then there was the mom who talked about sending her kids to the child care at the hotel for the day and then asked her daughter how old she was when the waitress came around to write up their breakfast buffet bill.

But we met some wonderful people. We visited with a lady principal and her husband from California on our whale watching tour. At the luau we enjoyed talking to a single Canadian doctor, originally from South Africa, who takes vacations every three or four months for three or four weeks. His next trip was to Australia. He was very interesting. Then there was the odd mix of people we met at the pool and hot tub after dark. They were from Pennsylvania, Colorado, California, and Canada. Just mention Nebraska and before you know it, the guys are talking Martinez and Burkhead. Imagine that.

Now that we are back in Nebraska, the islands seem out of reach. I would love to go back and spend more time on the beach and take the kids. However, now we need to focus on the holidays. I’ve got the last of the presents to buy and I still haven’t done the Christmas cards.

All I need is a nice photo. I’ve got one of Rick and I by the ocean that could work. Of course, I’ve also got one of the nice bikini kayak instructor. What would Todd do in this situation? I can harbor a guess. Really.

View from the pool

Rick on the boogie board

Pool drinks

She's On Library Loan

This whole parenting gig is never what you think it will be. Just when you get comfortable and assume you’ve got it all figured out, somebody turns into a teenager and draws doodles all over your rulebook.

OK, so I think my daughter is a pretty girl. She is 14, tall, athletic, and has big beautiful blue eyes. They are her daddy’s big beautiful blue eyes, and I’ve always been somewhat partial to those eyes. So I suppose I am biased. But so is just about every parent out there.

Yes I’m pretty proud of my pretty daughter. It is nice to look at your daughter and think “oh what a pretty little girl,” even when that little girl grows an inch or two taller than you are.

But now those looks are generating a new feeling in the pit of my stomach: fear.

This week Mandy finished the paper work to be a teen volunteer at the Bennett Martin library, located in downtown Lincoln.  She will volunteer for about an hour and a half a week, cleaning up, helping with shelving, doing crafts with the little kids, signing up people for the summer reading program (this spring), and performing whatever grunt tasks they throw her way.

As we sat at the table completing the paperwork, I looked around the library. Bennett Martin is a rough place (sorry Carrie, but it is). The first time I went to Bennett Martin I remember that some guy was being arrested and handcuffed across the street when I walked out. A police officer actually had the guy up against a building and was shoving handcuffs on him. Lovely first impression.

There are security guards at this library, one of the few libraries in Lincoln with uniformed security. My sister works at this library full-time, and always has one of the security guards walk her to her car at the end of the day. It closes at 6pm, to help with the crime issues. I guess the security keeps busy breaking up fights or taking care of disorderly visitors, as well as clearing out the bums who wander in to sleep in the stacks during the winter to escape the cold. This year they had a problem when somebody peed all over a section of books back in the stacks. Nice.

My sister has had stalkers and refuses to dress up or wear makeup when she goes to work. However, I think I’ve seen her dress up and wear makeup maybe twice a year, so I don’t know if I believe the whole “work camouflage” theory. (Just because the jeans don’t have any holes in them does not mean they qualify as fancy. And anything you purchase in the Scheels athletic-wear section should not be worn to church.) Tom boys never pass on, they just buy a bigger size of athletic shorts.

As we drive home, Mandy gets talking about how excited she is to be able to volunteer. She is looking forward to spending so much time at the library. It will be awesome to shelf books and work with the little kids in the youth section. It is the perfect volunteer opportunity for her, she says. She can’t wait until she gets her own name tag.

I am so glad that my daughter is excited to be a volunteer. I know that I always feel so good after I read at the nursing home. I’m happy that she wants to do something to help out in her community, as well. I really think that she can do a lot of good at the downtown library. I guess that Bennett Martin currently has only one other youth volunteer, while the other libraries in town are teaming with them. I am happy she will be volunteering in such a multicultural environment. There are families of all different backgrounds that use that library and I know she will love it. She likes to make new friends, especially with people of different backgrounds and languages. I think it started when she attended a large multicultural preschool in town, and had lots of friends at an early age who had English as a second language. I’d caution to say it is why she loves British soccer camp so much, but I rather think that is because of the hot British coaches. She is a sucker for a boy with a British accent.

But as I look at her as we drive home, this fear starts brewing in the pit of my stomach. I don’t know if I want to send my baby to that rough place. I don’t want her to have stalkers following her around the library. This is really out of my comfort zone.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been afraid before as a parent. We’ve had worrisome health issues. She has been to the hospital before and was even in the emergency room when she was attacked by a dog. She’s even been lost on her bicycle before in town.

But this is another kind of fear. It’s that fear that she is going out in the great big world, out on her own. And Rick and I won’t always be right there to protect her.

And I know this will only get worse. Wait until she drives. Wait until she moves out on her own. Wait until she shows up with some lecherous tattooed loser who wants to borrow her credit card to fill up his motorcycle with gas.

Actually, I’m not so worried about that last one. Mandy doesn’t like bad boys. I know you think I am insanely naïve, but she does not. I know because I’ve pointed out a few. (I’ve always had a soft spot for a man with a motorcycle.) She just rolls her eyes and says she is not interested. Also, Rick is a card-carrying NRA member and an environmental engineer. He’s got guns and he knows where to hide the bodies. He’s every hormone-crazy teenage boy’s worst nightmare.

So the fear begins.

I should mention that along with becoming a volunteer at the library, she was asked to be on the teen advisory board for the Bennett Martin library. (Thank you auntie Carrie, new young adult coordinator at Bennett Martin.)

But mom, she says, I get to meet once a month with the other TAB members and eat pizza and suggest books for the young adult section. Oh yeah, and there are boys on this TAB thing. And apparently they aren’t all nerds and some are really cute. Oh yeah, and they have their own TAB prom with the TAB members from the other Lincoln libraries at the end of the year.

I suppose Carrie will also be paying for the dress? I didn’t think so. Oh the joy.

One positive note I feel I must mention. Earlier this week Mandy told me how happy she is right now with her life. The school year started off pretty crappy. Her best friends went off to high school without her. And then there was another incident, which I won’t go into, that added to her sadness. But, wonder of all wonders, she told me that it was the best thing that ever happened to her. If she hadn’t been on her own, she wouldn’t have worked so hard in volleyball and made it on the gold team. (Woohoo.) And she wouldn’t have made all the great new friends she has now. (The girl is constantly chatting with numerous people, several of which she says are her best friends.) And she wouldn’t have the time to work on the stories she is writing. (Her stories are wicked awesome. She put one of her first short stories on her own blog, entitled theendofbarbieandken.blogspot.com. The girl has a gift for dialogue and suspense.) So mom, you were right. Things did get better. (OK, so maybe I added that last little bit. But I will admit I was doing a vindicating happy dance in my head at the time as if she had said it.)

So this whole parenting gig continues to be a challenge to my intelligence and my sanity. One thing I will say, however. Mandy will not be wearing those new Miss Me jeans or her skinny jeans at the library. And she will not be curling her hair and wearing lip gloss. On Bennett Martin days we will be following the new auntie Carrie dress code – baggy jeans, no makeup, hair in basic ponytail. Who knew that one day I would be looking to Carrie for fashion advice? Baby sisters may actually be contributing members of society. Wonders never cease.

P.S. Sorry this is not a Maui blog. I know I should do a Maui blog. It is in the works. I just really have to fine-tune my Toddisms from the trip.

P.S.S. I know the first word out of Carrie’s mouth when she reads this: “Hurtfullllllllll.” I love you Carrie. Feel free to pick on me in your blog or Facebook. Just make sure you keep one eye on my daughter at all times when she is volunteering. We all know you got it going on. J

Craft Show Junkies

If you know me, you know I knit. I am rarely sitting without needles and yarn in hand. 

But this fall while knitting at a craft show, I honest to goodness had a woman come over and take the needles straight out of my hands. She just had to show me an easier way to knit. She said I was knitting the hard way. Really? Is there a hard way? She assured me that she has been knitting since she was three – because she is from Europe – and they know the way to really knit. Yes, how did she know that I’ve been looking for a strong-willed Norwegian woman to whip me into shape? 

If you have ever seen my craft booth, you know that I know how to knit. Not only do I know how to knit, I am a very fast knitter. Yes, I know that there are pickers and throwers, and there are special styles to casting on and all that. The lady at the yarn store in town keeps bothering me to come in and take a class. I knit backwards or left-handed, or something like that. To learn how to knit correctly would just screw me up royally. Don’t you know you can’t teach a smart-aleck dog a new trick? Thanks for nothing, Danny Noonan, that’s all I need. (Sorry, obscure Caddyshack reference.) 

Sometimes people just make me laugh. We all have this innate human nature in us that we feel we should tell other people “I am good at this and I can do it better than you” I guess. 

Craft shows bring out all kinds of people: the silent shoppers, the big talkers, the fast browsers, and the little old ladies who just want to visit. You hear a lot when you sit in your booth. I love to people watch. I love the ladies who shop in groups and gossip the whole time. I love the husbands who follow their wives, shuffling their feet and looking around for some escape. One of my favorites was an older lady who shopped from the comfort of her powered scooter. Her little poodle dog sat in the basket on the front and her husband followed dutifully behind, picking things up for her to look at and scuttling about to fulfill whatever order she gave out. What a hoot. However, I must say my all-time favorite was in Council Bluffs at a holiday show. A gentleman dressed as Santa herded his holiday-attired geese around the show with a big staff. Each goose even sported a festive diaper. Carrie and I took plenty of pictures that day. The sound was delightful, the smell not so much. 

I love to visit with the other crafters. Once 2pm hits, the craft shows are virtually empty and there is plenty of time to catch up with old friends and make a few new ones. We compare notes with other vendors on which shows are the best, who raised their booth fees, and who is just reselling products featuring “made in China” stickers on the bottom. We all gossip about the lady who pulls her purses out of shrink-wrapped plastic bags a few minutes before the craft show opens. I also enjoyed all the booths with the headbands and plastic flowers this year. I’m wondering how many people know that the vendor just bought those headbands in bulk from Hobby Lobby for less than a dollar each and popped a $2-3 flower they purchased at the same store? Hand-crafted sometimes just means taken by hand out of the bag. But the kids love it. I can’t say I haven’t purchased one or two of these headbands myself for gifts. 

Yes, I am a craft-show junkie. I have become addicted to products made by many of my friends. I always hunt down Uncle Slappy’s BBQ sauce, pick up a bottle of cinnamon honey, buy an ornament from Dorothy, get a necklace or two from my cohorts, and then try to squeeze in a new end table I bought from the two crafter sisters I gab with at most of my shows. Jewelry and food, I always end up next to the jewelry and food, my weaknesses. 

And when I bring my fourteen-year-old daughter Mandy along to help at the shows, well, I might as well plan to spend a good deal more. She finds jewelry, food (this sounds familiar) and recently a socktopus. At the Seward show she found an end table with a British flag painted on the top. She is addicted to all things British: British soccer, British television shows, boys with British accents. How many British soccer camps has the girl attended just to check out the British coaches? She was lucky I was a master at the game of Tetris or she would have been riding home with that thing on her lap. 

Fortunately I had another good year this year to pay for all my craft addictions, as well as my daughter’s. I have several repeat customers and I know what people like to buy in the different parts of the state. But while I’m getting savvier, I’m building up that thick skin. You see, sometimes people don’t think before they speak. Actually sometimes people don’t think at all. 

For example, I am well aware that many people know how to knit. I often hear “Oh, I could make that.” “I knit so and so and such and such.” Yes, that is fantastic. It’s probably beautiful and wonderful. 

I make the things in my booth. You can buy them or not. They are products of a business. And if you don’t like the price I charge, Wal-Mart is generally just down the road. Of course, I would like to see someone make what I make for the price I make it. I get most of my yarn wholesale. Plus, almost everything I have I make my own pattern for. Yes, some of the things I sell are very basic patterns. Take, for example, a basic drop-stitch scarf. But my baby sweaters and dresses, my vests, as well as my hats, are one of a kind. Good luck. 

I’ve also been told that I can’t have made everything in my booth myself. Very few people believe that I do everything by hand. They say that there is no way I have enough time to make everything there by myself, by hand. But I don’t own a knitting machine. Some women also argue with me that they just know that I crocheted a vest or a scarf. I have to simply say that I don’t know how to crochet, so how could it be crochet? 

But for as many crabby people I encounter, I have as many wonderfully sweet shoppers to make the trip worthwhile. Everyone always loves the baby sweaters. I hear lots of oohs and ahs. They always remark, “if only I had a baby to buy this for today.” A gentleman a few weeks ago asked me if this was my grandma bait. Why, yes it is. 

I wish I had a camera to record all the people I see at the craft shows. I love the Husker red. Most of my shows are on Saturdays, so I see tons of Husker red. However, when I was in Hillsboro, Kansas, I saw lots and lots of purple. Poor Rick. He couldn’t find the Husker football game in a restaurant or bar that day to save his life. Poor guy.  

My poor, sweet husband. I really couldn’t do any of this if he wasn’t there to encourage me, drive me to the icy shows, carry in the big items through the snow and sleet, or just meet me in the driveway after a show to unload. And I don’t know what it is about that man, but if I leave my booth when he is along, he will have sold $50-$200 worth of stuff during the time I was gone. I’m not sure if that is because he has a cute face, people feel sorry for a man there by himself, or if I just take a long time coming back because I talk too much. I’m gonna say a little of all three and leave it at that.  

This Sunday was my last show of the season. My containers came home much emptier than when I started the season in August. In fact, I was able to leave a couple boxes and one table at home the last show because I sold so much.  

Every year is a little different. I didn’t have my sister Carrie with me at any shows this year, because she is all grown up now wearing the big girl pants as a full-time librarian and a part-time student. My daughter Mandy picked up the slack this year. It was actually a delight to have her with me at many of my shows, in spite of the extra expense. She will get up at 5am without much prodding. Also, the girl can add up totals and figure the tax without any help from me, so I can actually leave the booth occasionally. All those muscles from volleyball and soccer mean she can tote in any of my boxes or racks, probably even better than I can. And she has an awesome eye for color, so I often find I don’t have to fix any of the displays she sets up, unlike her father (navy and black do not belong together, and yes the manikins need clothes).  

There were even occasional bonding moments. She shared her iPod headphones with me during boring afternoons, and there were times I even appreciated her eye rolls. Sometimes that teenage sass helps take the sting away from crabby shoppers. I don’t know how many times we listened to Mumford and Sons. I also don’t know how many times the teen food deliverers needed to check that we got our lunch order. (Attention Odell teen helpers, just because you put your delivery tray in front of your face to talk about some girl does not mean that she can’t hear you. Also, grunting at her is not a good way to make a good impression.) 

And now on to planning for next year, and for Christmas, and for Hawaii. I sat down this morning and honestly didn’t know what to do with myself. I had a cup of coffee, paid some bills, and wandered around the house. I guess I’ll put on some Mumford and Sons, make something for supper with my Uncle Slappy’s sauce, and wrap a few presents. Then I guess I will just twiddle my thumbs. Maybe I do need that strong-willed Norwegian woman to tell me what to do next.